The Beast Within

私の中の獣


Altera:
I have been waiting…
I have been waiting for you.

[1] — Where… are we?

[1] Altera:
I do not know for certain, either.

[2] — Are we in… a dream?

[2] Altera:
Yes… your instincts are good, Master.

Altera:
I cannot say this with certainty, but I can infer, to a degree.

Altera:
We are… within me.

Altera:
Not physically, but mentally.

Altera:
Within me… yes, I believe we are likely inside my memories – as the great warlord of the Huns…

Altera:
…my memories as a hero.

[1] — As a hero?
[2] — I don’t really understand.

Altera:
It is as I said.
This is the memory of me from when I was known as the great destroyer Attila.

Altera:
When I was but a wordless, thoughtless mechanism which simply continued to destroy all civilization within sight.

Altera:
This is my memory. That is why…

Altera:
…there is, nothing.

Altera:
I did not think as a human being.
I did not feel, either.

Altera:
I could do neither.

Altera:
What say you of this spectacle?

Altera:
I stand before you, flat earth and empty skies stretching as far as can be seen…
Levelled ground removed of all emotions and aims – the death of this celestial being.

Altera:
You…
Yes, you must see this place as whatever is ‘closest’ to that for you.

Altera:
Each may perhaps see it different – but this dark desolation is me.

Altera:
Despite the memories I have, there is nothing here. No friends, no family…

Altera:
No voices in the air, only the screeching of the wind.

Altera:
Ha… it is empty.

Altera:
To think that I led so many comrades and yet not a single one could be found within these memories…

[1] — I would say that it’s quiet.
[2] — This is calming in its own way.

Altera:
You are kind.

Altera:
No, perhaps that is not the right word to use for someone like you.

Altera:
I…

Altera:
…I never once thought to break another’s life.
However, I always destroyed all civilization expanding before me…

Altera:
A paradox, is it not?
And yet I found myself unable to walk any other path.

Altera:
To survive, and propagate…
I am removed from this basest fundamental that is universal to all inhabitants of this world.

Altera:
The directive carved into my base is ‘destruction’.
I advanced, not wishing to kill, but to destroy.

Altera:
But, as a result, there were many deaths.
I killed many. The earth was always painted crimson.

Altera:
And yet…
All that is left for me is this dark bleakness, and…

Altera:
Behold… they come.

???:
—–…

Altera:
It was wrong to claim that nothing was here.

Altera:
They are here.
These faceless ones, their names lost to me.

Altera:
They are the ones I robbed of life.
I did not recognize them as individuals… but only fought and killed them.

Altera:
Now is the time to employ your strength, Master… assuming that summoning system of yours works.

Altera:
You must fight, or die.

Altera:
Not that I can say for certain… whether death even exists here.


Altera:
Well done, Master.
You survived thanks to your summons.

[1] — This is a dream, right…?
[2] — I feel like I’ve used up a lot of mana…

Altera:
This is a dream.
But our minds are real.

Altera:
Mana is what connects the spirit and the flesh, is it not?
It only makes sense that you expended some of it.

Altera:
You have not used it all up, yes? Good.
Look… for it is not yet over.

???:
——-…

Altera:
So this time… they are not even men.

Altera:
What were these?
I do have some vague recollections of cutting down monsters.

Altera:
Or is that some concept given form?

Altera:
No matter…

???:
—–!!!

Altera:
…Hmph.
For a concept, it is filled with deadly intentions.

Altera:
But I feel envy for even such beings.
My own wretchedness engulfs me.

Altera:
Moods and emotions…
I did not possess such things in the past, and now I do.

Altera:
However, I cannot drive these feelings.
I understand joy, yet I know not the way to express it.

[1] — L-Let’s take down these monsters first!

[1] Altera:
Of course.
You understand the order of things, Master.

[2] — Doesn’t that just mean you’re bad at socializing?

[2] Altera:
That… troubles me.
In the past, many of my comrades said much the same to me.

[2] Altera:
It is a happy thought… but it saddens me.
If only the truth were so simple.

Altera:
Either way, we must defeat them first.
Come, Master. Show your skill once more.

Altera:
If you end here, you will die.
Then our contract is ended.

Altera:
I shall be free of this bondage, and you shall be free of life.

Altera:
But that would be far too dull.
Do your best, and do not die.

Altera:
I would like to speak with you… if only a little more.


Altera:
An impressive performance, Master…

Altera:
Perhaps I was wrong about you.
I expected you unable to advance further.

Altera:
I underestimated your existence – you who would save the world.

Altera:
Now… it is time for you to return.
It does not befit you to remain in this place.

Altera:
Only I belong here.
After all…

Altera:
…this is my darkness.


Mashu:
Good morning, Senpai.

Mashu:
You weren’t there at the arranged time. I came to take a look…

Mashu:
So you overslept…
Are you all right? You were tossing about in your sleep.

[1] — It wasn’t so bad.
[2] — It was pretty tough.

Mashu:
Is, is that so?
Maybe later, you could tell me… never mind, it’s nothing.

Mashu:
Breakfast is ready.
Let’s go, Senpai.

Fou, fou!

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